2015 Race to Robie Creek Race Report: I Fought the Hill and the Hill Won!

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Or maybe it should be called “I fought the heat and the heat won!” And what is the point of being half Egyptian if I can’t run in the heat, anyway?!?!

I started the day with high expectations.  I was hoping to beat my time from last year (which was 2:09 something) or maybe even do as well as 2:05.  I felt like I had trained well.  I had trained harder and more for this Robie than any other Robie: more mileage, more speedwork, more hill repeats, more time on the course, more weights, more core work, more cross training.  I think my fitness level is in a better place than last year, so I didn’t think I’d have an issue beating my time.  Plus, on my long runs, I actually *ran* to the summit.  It was a slow run, but I was “running.”  And that’s something I had never done before.  So I hoped to be able to do that in the race too.

I covered my watch hoping I’d be able to go off of effort and not be distracted or discouraged by pace as it slowed towards the summit, as I had in previous years.  I felt okay the first couple of miles.  On the first hill I told myself I would not pass anybody.  That would my way of keeping my pace in check.  However there were some people that stopped to walk and others that were just running at a slower pace than I felt I wanted to be running so I did pass some people.  When I got to the 3 mile marker I saw it and thought something along these lines: “Oh s@#$!.  Only 3 miles and I feel like I am running out of gas already. I must have run the first 5k too fast.  I effed up.  I am totally screwed.  I want to quit.  I am never going to make it to the top.  I am not even at the dirt yet and I am hot.  And I feel sick.  This sucks.”  Totally self defeating thoughts.  Not exactly what you want at mile three of a half marathon.  Or any race really.  I thought when I looked at my splits for the first 3 miles I was going to see that I had run them ridiculously fast or something.  When I saw the splits I don’t think I had run them too fast.  I think it was just the heat that got me.  The heat got me last year too.  I got too hot too fast.

After that point I started walking through each water station.  I’d grab two cups of water and drink one and pour the other one over my head.  Once I got to the dirt I felt a little better.  I like the dirt better than the pavement.  And by a little, I mean just a little.  I was still pretty miserable and feeling sick.  I saw Ashley pretty early on in the dirt passed her and told her good job.  It made me so happy to see another Bettie!  I was pretty sure she’d be passing me soon because I didn’t have much in the tank.  At the next water stop Sarah came by me and patted me on the back and told me good job.  Again, another Bettie encouraging me along the way!  We leapfrogged with each other over the next water stop or two and then I couldn’t keep up anymore.  I felt that each time I stopped and walked at a water stop it got harder and harder for me to start running again.  And I really wanted to quit.  More than I’ve ever wanted to quit any other race I’ve done.  I started thinking of ways I could get to James’ car and get to the people I’d promised rides home, but I couldn’t figure out a way.  There was no option but to run over the hill! GRR! I also felt really hot and sick (nauseated).  At around mile 4 or 5 I forced myself to have a gel even though I didn’t want it.  I kept thinking of my kids and that I didn’t want to have a stroke or pass out or something and that’s another reason why I kept walking through the water stations. I also kept noticing that I had goosebumps all over my arms.  I tried not to look at them because I didn’t want to think about the heat exhaustion.  I just kept telling myself to put one foot in front of the other.  I hated that I was not enjoying the race.  One of the purposes of covering up my watch was to make the race more enjoyable!

That last steep mile to the summit I did a run/walk.  I just wanted to be done.  I kept thinking of who might be behind me.  “Maybe Claire is behind me?,” I thought.  “I know!” I can stop at the top, wait and cheer for her, and then we can run down together!” Then I saw Gretchen in the distance.  I know I didn’t SOUND* very excited when I saw her, but I was SUPER excited to see her.  “GRETCHEN!” I thought. “IS THAT GRETCHEN?!? How did she get up here? Maybe SHE can get me out of here!” That was the perfect spot for her to be cheering at too.  Just a half mile before the summit, right where we all needed encouragement the most.  THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. For everything that you do for us.  We all love and appreciate you so much!

Once I got over the summit, I started to feel MUCH better.  I felt pretty strong on the back, actually.  I saw that my time at the summit was 1:32 something.  That’s what it was last year.  I was disappointed, but not surprised.  At that point I knew I would be either right at or over my time from last year and I decided I wasn’t going to kill myself for a 2 second PR or something, especially since I felt so miserable and had bombed the front side.  So I pushed it coming down, but didn’t red line it or anything.  At mile 10 I still felt pretty strong somehow.  By mile 12 I was ready to be done again and so happy to see the finish.  When I heard the announcer say my name, I heard “Josh Jackman” right along with it and looked and he was right there with me at the finish!  I told him congrats and he said he’d been following me for awhile and thanked me for pacing him and carrying him along.  Glad I was helpful to someone in spite of my misery!

I felt better than last year at the finish (last year I felt a little sick for awhile) but still didn’t want to eat for awhile.  Had a recovery drink and some fruit and a power bar on the way home and then ate more later. Like I said before I thought initially it was going out too fast that killed me, but once I looked at my splits I think it was the heat.  And maybe too much caffeine, but probably mostly the heat.  I guess maybe I should be doing long runs in the middle of the day if I am going to do this race?

I feel frustrated because I feel like I am at a better place fitness wise than I was a year ago, but I wasn’t able to perform better.  At least not on April 18, 2015.  I also feel disappointed because I feel like maybe 2:05 is too lofty of a Robie goal for me and I’d like to break 2 hours one day.  It is a hard race.  And I am not getting any younger.  I am feeling a little defeated, old and humbled after that race.  But I also feel motivated to get back to work so that I can hopefully have a better race later this year. More than anything I don’t like all of the negative thoughts I was having during the race and the fact that I wanted to quit.  I want to stay strong when I am hurting and to be able to reach deep in my mental toolbox and pull through.  Even though it was a tough run for me, I am proud that I finished, I had a great day with my friends, and I am so thankful to have such an amazing coach and a wonderful group of women to run with.  You all keep me going day after day after day! Thank you!


*I ran up to her, dropped the f-bomb, told her that my run was a disaster and that if I weren’t giving people rides I’d have the medical cart take me down the hill.  Of course, she cheerfully encouraged me to keep going.  And I apologized for my outburst later.  And thanks to everyone who needed rides for keeping me on that hill!

Fueling Your Runs with Positive Thoughts

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Ever heard the phrase running is 90% mental and 10% physical? We spend lots of time working on fine tuning the physical, but how often do we work on strengthening the mental. For me, the mental aspect is key, especially when the race or workout gets difficult. And let’s face it, as much as we all love running, running is hard sometimes. That is part of what makes it so rewarding. Nevertheless, there are times during workouts and races when inevitably those negative thoughts creep into our heads. This should not be surprising, as we often push our body to its limits, especially when racing.  I have told Coach G on more than one occasion that the mental aspects of training can at times feel just as tough for me as the physical aspects. I feel too slow, too injured, too old, too tired, too something. I am not alone in my negative thinking. A recent study showed that pessimism is the number one mental roadblock among runners. Negative thinking patterns can have a detrimental impact on our training. From staying in bed to cutting working shorts to considering dropping out of a race, if we are not thinking positive thoughts we are not getting the most out of our hard work.

 

Overcoming negativity is a personal and ongoing process for me, as it is for most runners, but one that can be largely assisted by my coach and teammates. Before joining the Betties I had Coach G confirm on more than one occasion that she would actually coach me. Having read and heard all about her impressive running resume I was not sure I was qualified. “Are you sure you’ll coach me?” I asked. “But you know what pace I run!” To which she always laughed and responded with a kind, “Yes, of course.” and “I’m looking to coach the most committed runners.” Committed I can do!

 

So I showed up, practice after practice, often affectionately and sometimes not so affectionately referring to myself in my head as “The Caboose” because I was always last. But you know what? This was me telling me these things, not my teammates and not my coach. Day after day and week after week my coach and teammates were there to encourage and support me and others no matter what pace we were running. And they’ve been the ones helping me silence the negative thoughts that try to sabotage my workouts and racing. Here are some specific strategies that have helped me keep the negative thoughts at bay and fuel my runs with more positivity. Try a few and maybe you will find one or two that will work for you.

 

Show Up.  It takes courage to show up to practices consistently so don’t discount that. Do not worry about your pace, worry about running effort based workouts that are right for your body on any given day. Somebody has to run in the back and if it is you, congratulations, you are well ahead of all of the people that didn’t show up!

 

Find a Mantra.  When negative thoughts creep in, it is often helpful to find a positive mantra to repeat in your head. Practice during training runs and find something that works for you to have in your pocket for race day. I personally have repeated the phrases “Tight makes light” and “Strong, powerful, beautiful” in my head during races and tough workouts to distract myself from other thoughts. I am not sure where they came from, but I have found the rhythmic nature of those phrases helpful for some reason. Other examples could be: fast, tall, go, swift, this mile, or breathe.  And while you are at it, remember to practice some positive self talk. Congratulate yourself for making it to practice and remind yourself that you are doing something positive for your body. When you are climbing that hill, tell yourself, “I am great at climbing hills” or “I know how to do this,” and remember to smile!

 

Visualize.  Sometimes when I start to think negatively during a run I will visualize a stop sign in front of me. As in “Stop the negative thinking!  It’s not helpful!”  Often just that is enough to help redirect my thoughts. Focusing on breathing and footfalls can also help as well as visualizing yourself running in perfect form. And remember that fatigue can be highly subjective.  A 2012 study tested cyclists against a computerized competitor in two trials. In one test, the cyclists were told that the computerized opponent was riding at the cyclists’ personal best, when in reality, the opponent was riding faster.  In the second test, they were told the competitor was speedier. When the cyclists knew their opponent was faster, they could not keep up, but when they thought they were evenly matched (even though the opponent was in reality riding faster) they rode faster. Our minds are very powerful!

 

Break the race or run up into smaller pieces.  The last mile of the last 5k I ran was difficult. I started to berate myself with thoughts like “I’m not fast enough” and “I should just jog it in.” When I looked up at the street sign and saw I was at 17th Street and knew I had to make it all the way back to 8th, I felt particularly deflated. I pictured the red Stop sign and tried to focus on making it one block at a time. Breaking the race into smaller chunks helped make the remainder of the race more manageable, and I was at the finish line before I knew it.

 

Reframe your Thoughts.  Instead of thinking “What could go wrong?”, think “What could go right?”  Instead of thinking, “What if I fail?”, try thinking, “What if I exceed my expectations today?” Take your negative thought and try to rephrase it to something positive. Think of the obstacles you might face, how you would approach them, and what you might learn from them even if things do not work out the way you want them to. I trained for a half marathon all summer and found out just a few days before the race that they changed the course due to construction, thereby making it 13.4 miles instead of 13.1 miles. My initial reaction was negative. “Why wouldn’t they cut the course somewhere else? How would I possibly get a PR on a long course?” Then I realized I would not have a good run or good race if I went into it with that much negativity. So I revised my goal time accordingly and arrived at the start line ready to have fun and enjoy a nice fall run through the heart of my beautiful city.

 

Run with Awesome People.  I knew I had found something special in The Betties when mere weeks after I had joined the team I ran The Race to Robie Creek and my teammates postponed their post-race trip to the beer table in order to wait at the finish line and cheer me on. Although we all come from different walks of life and many of us are in different stages of life, our love of running brings us together. Some of us run fast and some of us run slow, but we are all committed to running, to the team and to supporting each other, which makes it a wonderful and encouraging environment.

 

Hire a Fantastic Coach.  A great running coach is like a therapist and personal trainer combined. On Tuesday and Thursday mornings Coach G pushes us physically while shouting encouraging words into our ears and the results are phenomenal. I’ve told Coach G before that she is like the little angel on my shoulder with the positive thoughts to combat the devilish thoughts that my brain so readily provides.  And I can tell you from experience that on race day even when Coach G is not there running alongside you, you’ll still hear her shouting in your ear, “You are strong! You trained hard to race easy!” And the best part is that you will know in your heart it is true.

Run Naked and Tune In to Your Internal GPS

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Earlier this fall I promised myself (and Coach G for accountability) that I would run the Turkey Day 5k “naked.” Don’t worry, no need to keep the kids inside (I left my streaking days behind in college) — I’m not talking about taking my clothes off, I’m talking about running sans GPS watch. Scary, right? How would I pace myself without technology? How would I do without knowing anything about my time? I’d heard some positive things about running without a GPS watch and was curious about trying it, but my type A personality is quite attached to glancing at my watch every so often while training and racing so I was not sure how I would do without it.

Coach Jenny Hadfield suggests that runners practice running without GPS devices so that we can tune into our own bodies and run at the pace our bodies are ready to run on any given day rather than becoming hyper focused on the number on the watch. While GPS watches are a valuable training tool, when overused they can prevent us from finding our internal GPS.  Hadfield created three “effort-based” zones that we can try to visualize when running:

  • Yellow Zone (Easy): You should be able to have a conversation and talk in full sentences.
  • Orange Zone (Moderate): You should still be able to talk, but only in one or two word responses.
  • Red Zone (Hard): You do not feel like talking when running in this zone. You need all of the oxygen you can get and do not want to use any of it for speaking. This is the anaerobic zone.

Coach Hadfield recommends that when racing a 5k experienced runners warm up in the yellow zone and split the race evenly between the orange and red zone. So with that in mind, I put painters tape over my Bia GPS sports watch and prepared to give running naked a try.  I pressed start on my watch, peeked under the tape to make sure it was running, put the tape down again and crossed over the start mat. I tried to find someone who seemed like he or she was running about my pace to pace myself off of, but that proved to be a difficult strategy. This might work in a longer race like a half or full marathon, but in a crowded turkey day 5k, it was just not possible.  I was surrounded by all types of runners. Fast runners, slow runners, families running together, a runner in jeans, and runners in costume. I tried to just run in a straight line as best I could and find some sort of groove without doing too much weaving in and out of other people.

The urge to peek underneath the tape was strongest during the first half mile or so.  I kept looking down at my watch only to see blue painters tape with the message “Run Happy!” written on top.  But how far had I gone? What was my average pace? My inquiring mind wanted to know! After glancing down at my wrist at least 27 times in the first 3 minutes of the race, my brain finally got the message that it was not going to get any answers there and I began to focus on other things like my footfalls and my breath. Ah, perhaps THIS is how you tune in to your body! I was breathing hard, but not too hard — Like I could speak in two or three word sentences. I was in the orange zone! Exactly where I should be. I focused on my breath and tried to pick up my pace ever so slightly every time I passed a mile or half mile marker.

The last mile, and particularly the last half mile, felt very intense. I did not want to talk at all, but when a teammate passed me I did use a little bit of my precious oxygen to cheer her on.  (Nice work, Emily!!) I was certainly in the red zone. I felt like I was slowing down and had to dig deep mentally to maintain my pace to the finish. I crossed the finish, stopped my watch, and looked around for my teammates. I did not see a timing clock at the finish line so I still did not know my race time. When I finally did peek underneath that painters tape, what did I see?  A 2 ½ minute PR!

Not only did I run my best 5k without looking at my GPS watch, but I also ran faster than I thought I was capable of running on that day. Had I looked at my watch and seen the pace I was running, I likely would have panicked, thinking thoughts like “Slow down! That’s too fast! You won’t be able to keep that up for the whole 5k!”  But by using the Coach Hadifield’s zone method I was able to go by feel and run the pace that my body was ready for on that day. And I surprised myself. So try running naked sometime. You might surprise yourself too!